A Change of Perspective

I hate making lists.That's right I said it. I hate them. In fact it's become a running joke in our house about how I avoid list making. My husband is most definitely a "let's make a list" person. He reminds me every time we get home from grocery shopping that I wouldn't forget things if I just wrote it down. My reasoning is I'd most likely forget to write something on list and while shopping I'd focus on the list and still come home missing something so why bother with the effort to write it down. If I were to be completely honest though it's probably just laziness and a healthy doze of self confidence, "Of course I won't forget anything!"

With so much preparation needed for Passover you'd think I'd give in and write a list, especially considering this year that start of Passover landed on the long four day Easter weekend. Well if you thought that, you thought wrong. Do you know hard it is to find a open store on Good Friday? My husband does. Poor guy, it's good thing he loves me so much. He also knows all the hard work that goes into cleaning a house in preparation for Passover. With my sore back and a pregnant tummy that seems to get bigger by the second he offered his help this year to clean the house. While I baked, cooked and prepped the items for our Seder plate he scrubbed, cleaned and worked incredibly hard to get our home into kosher for Pesach shape. Every woman should be so lucky as to have a husband willing to help out like he does.

When all was said and done though my husband, myself and my daughter sat down last night and had a small, slightly rushed family Seder. I've been quite vocal about my feelings on Passover (see the post "Love Passover even though Mummy doesn't.") Last night though I will admit to truly enjoying myself. It's amazing how having a family changes your perspective. I wasn't looking in disgust at the maror (horseradish) thinking about just how little I can get away with putting on my piece of matzah. Instead I was enjoying watching Sari's face when she tried it. She wasn't a fan but it was quickly washed down with charozet (a apple,walnut, honey,wine/grape juice mixture.) I didn't think a thousand times how sick I'd be of matzah before the end of the night, let alone the end of eight days. Instead I loved hearing Sari call it a cookie and happily eat it as if it was the most delicious cookie she's ever eaten. I also didn't focus on how at 27 years old I still feel a bit silly singing the four questions. No this year I focused on how after hearing my husband and I sing Dayenu, my little princess went around singing the simple one word chorus not only all the way through dinner but through the rest of the Seder. In fact even after she had been put down to bed we could hear her singing to herself until she finally fell asleep. While I do enjoy the retelling of the story of Exodus, never have I enjoyed it as much I did when I watched Sari giggling as she jumped and said "ribbit, ribbit" like a frog. Seeing her enjoy her first ever Kosher for Pesach brownie, priceless. Like I said having a family changes your perspective. Am I going to look forward to Pesach every year? Probably not. It's still a lot of work and a long week of no chametz but last night something did change for me. This morning watching a classroom full of kids at Temple listening and acting out the story. I realised that my joy and pride in watching Sari love it is enough for me.

I wish you all a happy and kosher Pesach!